Mission Cafe Review: Haus Coffee

Haus Cafe San Francisco

I find myself at Haus, one of the most nauseatingly hipster coffee shops in the mission, let alone the whole city and I find myself oddly liking it. The design of the café is simple, modern, and perhaps a bit austere. It’s full of light-colored wood chairs, tables, and scaffolding; a concrete floor, a big glass window letting in the natural light, an open coffee bar where you watch the lone barista behind the counter prepare your drink, and a spacious back patio full of plants and natural light. A bit of sparse artwork adorns one of the walls. It’s obscure, colorful, has no apparent meaning.  Typical of San Francisco one small wall is full of fliers advertising creative writing classes at the “The Writing Salon”, an “Oldies Night” at a local mission bar, a learn to speak Spanish class, a meditation in Spanish class, a mysterious flier that reads: “MATHEMATICS / PLANET EARTH / CLIMATE DISRUPTION”, and various other posters for jazz, theater, and yoga.

Haus coffee interior designThe cafe’s patrons are engrossed in their work. A collection of white people in sloppily thrown together outfits and expensive, stylish shoes are typing away furiously at their keyboards. Are they all writers working on novels and poetry? Or are they programmers creating the next cool app?  (Fun)employed people looking for jobs?  Why is everybody here?

Haus cafe desksOne girl, a blonde, wears a grey button up top, with skinny black pants that taper down to her hi-top silver Nike’s.  She leans into her work with a focus that I recognize, I think I must be doing it too.  Another girl with long brown hair, a flowy white dress, and chunky high-heels pecks aimlessly at her computer, she’s working on some sort of spreadsheet and intermittently checking her Facebook. The most stylish guy there wears some light jeans, a dark t-shirt, and a pull over blue & white striped mariner shirt made of a soft fabric. It’s the type of fabric and texture that is recognizably expensive and designer. He has on some chunky Ray-bans and an expensive James Dean haircut.  Suede boat shoes and a brown leather bomber jacket complete the look, along with a white backpack designed in the satchel style with brown leather trim and metal buckles. It’s an expensive look and a concerted effort to effect that style that’s says I’m cool, but I don’t care that much.  These sort of outfits are what I have come to expect out of The Mission.

Haus Coffee CappucinoThey serve Ritual espresso, so naturally their espresso drinks are delicious.  The barista prepared for me a cappuccino with those little hearts on top. Overall it’s a pretty good place to get work done. Just make sure to bring a Mac and wear your coolest shoes though if you want to fit in.

Haus Cafe San Francisco

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Unpretentiousil – A cure for HIPSTER disorder

Finally, the big pharmaceutical companies have gotten together and developed a drug to treat the common anti-mainstream trends that ail us.

How it feels to sit down at a meal with hipsters

How many times have you sat down at a nice meal in The Mission District of San Francisco or a trendy little place in Brooklyn, New York only to have your food subjected to an all out photo shoot followed by your friends amateur critique of the finer flavors of your food? This video captures it perfectly.

Coffee Shop Review- The Financial District’s “Coffee Bar”

IMG_5696It seems this hipster coffee trend is continuing to grow with the opening of Coffee Bar on Montgomery Street in the Financial District of San Francisco. This place has all the makings of a hipster coffee shop. The store has a crisp, clean design with a simple menu and serves up mainly traditional espresso drinks, small cups of coffee, and a simple selection of pastries delivered daily from a local bakery. All the employees wear black shirts, indigo jeans, and occasionally grey vests or other accoutrements. Their is a certain air of condescension coming from behind the counter, but much more understated than their Valencia Street counter parts. Oh, and did I mention the coffee is really f-ing good?

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My main critique of the store is that instead of trying to do something new, it basically copied and synthesized various trends in cafes and threw it in haphazardly to the financial district. Probably the most blaring difference between walking into say Fourbarrel at 4 in the afternoon on the weekend, and Coffee Bar at 8 am is that you are simply going to get a different crowd. IMG_5693This isn’t your get coffee and linger to soak up the ambiance type of coffee shop. Instead it is in and out, and on your way back to the office.  Another difference is all the fun homeless people of downtown SF spicing up the urban ambiance.

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Being that this place is right next to my office I go there from time to time with my coworkers. One of them observed recently, ” Is there some sort of requirement to work at these hipster coffee shops that you have to have an ambiguous sexual orientation.” Haha, so true.

Another interesting attempt at fitting this hipster aesthetic is this faux-Instagram photo blown up and posted above the door inside.

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It shows an older white man in business clothes sitting on a financial district rooftop looking out over the bay.  I find it a little strange to take this virtual world aesthetic of Instagram and place it in your store as “artwork”. (As a side note, I love Instagram and you can follow me here under the name missionhipsters.)

What it feels like to order hipster coffee

How many times have you gone into Fourbarrel, Ritual or another hipster coffee place in the The Mission only to be made to feel a little awkward when you didn’t understand the menu or why you couldn’t order your favorite drink? This little sketch captures it perfectly.

http://FunnyOrDie.com/m/652h

Coffee Snobs – watch more funny videos